THE GOODWIFE OF CAIRO AND HER FOUR
GALLANTS. [FN#354]

It is said that in Misr lived a woman, a model of beauty and
loveliness and stature and perfect grace, who had a difficulty
with a man which was a Kazi and after this fashion it befel. She
was the wife of an Emir [FN#355] and she was wont to visit the
Baths once a month; and when the appointed term for her going
forth had come, she adorned herself and perfumed herself and
beautified herself and hastened, tripping and stumbling, [FN#356]
to the Hammám. Now her path passed by the Kazi’s court-house
where she saw many a man [FN#357] and she stopped to enjoy the
spectacle, upon which the judge himself glanced at her with a
glance of eyes that bequeathed to him a thousand sighs and he
asked her saying, "O woman, hast thou any want?" "No indeed,"
answered she, "I have none." Then he inclined to her and drawing
near her said, "O lady mine and O light of these eyne, is union
possible between us twain?" She replied, "’Tis possible," and he
enquired of her when it could be, and she made an appointment
with him saying, "Do thou come to me after supper-time,"—And
Shahrazad was surprised by the dawn of day and fell silent and
ceased to say her permitted say. Then quoth her sister Dunyazad,
"How sweet is thy story, O sister mine, and how enjoyable and
delectable! Quoth she, "And where is this compared with that I
would relate to you on the coming night an the King suffer me to
survive?" Now when it was the next night and that was

The Seven Hundred and Thirty-ninth Night,

Dunyazad said to her. "Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be
other than sleepy, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short
the watching of this our latter night." She replied, "With love
and good will!" It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the
director, the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting
and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating, that the
Goodwife said to the Kazi, "Do thou come to me after
supper-time," and went her ways and entered the Hammam, where she
washed herself and cleaned herself; then, coming out thence, she
determined to go home. But she was met on her road by a
Gentleman [FN#358] who was Sháhbandar of the Trader-guild, and he
seeing her set his affections upon her; so he accosted her,
saying, "Is’t possible that we ever be merry together?" Hereat
she appointed him to come when supper was done, after which she
left him and ganged her gait. As she neared her home she was met
by a Butcher whose heart inclined to her, so he addressed her
saying, "Is union possible?" and she appointed him to visit her
an hour after supper had been eaten. Then she went home and
mounting the stairs took seat in the upper saloon open to the
air, where she doffed her head-veil [FN#359] and all that was upon
her head. Now in the neighbourhood of her house was a Trader and
he had mounted to the terrace-roof for a reason; so when the
woman bared her hair and taking up a comb began to dry and
prepare it for dressing, his eyes fell upon her whilst so
engaged, and his heart was engrossed with her love. Presently he
sent to her an old woman; and she returned him a reply and
appointed him to visit her house during the night after
supper-tide. On this wise she had promised herself to four
men. [FN#360] Now the Kazi had got ready for her a Kohl-style and
the Gentleman had prepared for her a fine suit of clothes and the
Butcher had led for her a full-sized ram and the Trader had set
apart for her two pieces of silk. As soon as it was supper-time,
behold, the Kazi repaired to her in privacy bringing his gift and
knocked at the door which he found unbolted and she cried to him,
"Come in." Accordingly he entered to her and presented to her
that which was with him, but hardly had he settled himself
comfortably in his seat when the Gentleman arrived and also
rapped. Quoth the Kazi to the Goodwife, "Who may this be?" and
quoth she, ‘Fear thou nothing, but arise and doff thy dress;" so
he stripped himself altogether and she garbed him in a gaberdine
and bonnet [FN#361] and hid him in a closet and went to open the
door. Hereupon appeared the Consul and she let him in and
accepted what he had brought and seated him beside her. But
hardly had he settled down when, behold, there came a knock at
the door and he cried, "Who may that be?" Said she, "Fear nothing
but up and doff thy dress;" so he arose and stripped himself and
she disguised him in a gaberdine and bonnet and hid him in
another closet all alone. Then she hastened to the door and
suddenly the Flesher-man appeared and she let him in and led him
within and having accepted his present seated him; but hardly was
he at his case when the door was again knocked, whereat he was
overcome and affrighted: however, she said to him, "Fear nothing,
but arise and doff thy dress in order that I may hide thee." So
he threw off his clothes and she invested him in a gaberdine and
a bonnet and thrust him into a third cabinet. After this she went
and opened the door when there came to her the Trader who was her
neighbour, so she let him in and took what was with him, and
seated him; and he was proceeding to sit down in comfort when
behold, some one knocked at the door and he said, "Who may that
be?" Hereupon she cried, "O my honour! O my calamity! This is my
husband who but yesterday [FN#362] killed off four men; however do
thou rise up and doff thy dress." He did as she bade him, upon
which she garbed him in a gaberdine and a bonnet and laid him in
a fourth closet. So these four one and all found themselves in as
many cabinets [FN#363] sorely sorrowful and fearful; but she went
forth and suddenly her mate the Emir came in and took seat upon a
chair that was in the house. Hereat all four sensed that she had
opened to her husband and had admitted him; and they said in
their minds, "Yesterday he killed four men and now he will kill
me." And each and every considered his own affair and determined
in his mind what should happen to him from the husband. Such was
the case with these four; but as regards the housemaster, when he
took seat upon the chair, he fell to chatting with his wife and
asking her saying, "What hast thou seen this day during thy walk
to the Hammam?" Said she, "O my lord, I have witnessed four
adventures and on every one hangeth a wondrous tale!" Now when
the four heard the Goodwife speaking these words each of them
said to himself, "Indeed I am a dead man and ’tis the intention
of this woman to peach upon me." Presently her husband asked her,
"What be these four histories?" and answered she, "I saw four men
each and every of whom was an antic fellow, a droll, a buffoon;
furthermore, O my lord, one and all of them were garbed in
gaberdine and bonnet."—And Shahrazad was surprised by the dawn
of day and fell silent and ceased saying her permitted say. Then
quoth her sister Dunyazad, "How sweet and tasteful is thy tale, O
sister mine, and how enjoyable and delectable!" Quoth she, "And
where is this compared with that I would relate to you on the
coming night an the Sovran suffer me to survive?" Now when it was
the next night and that was

The Seven Hundred and Forty-first Night,

Dunyazad said to her, "Allah upon thee, O my sister, an thou be
other than sleepy, finish for us thy tale that we may cut short
the watching of this our latter night!" She replied, "With love
and good will!" It hath reached me, O auspicious King, the
director,the right-guiding, lord of the rede which is benefiting
and of deeds fair-seeming and worthy celebrating, that the woman
said to her husband, "Moreover each of the four was habited in
gaberdine and bonnet." But when the amourists heard these words
every one of them said to himself, "Here be a judgment this
strumpet of a woman hath wrought upon us, the whore! the witch!"
and her husband understanding what she told him asked, "Wherefore
didst thou not bring them hither that the sight might solace us?"
"O my lord," answered she, "had I brought them what hadst thou
said to them? indeed I fear me thou wouldst have slain them!" And
he, "No indeed; I would not have killed them, for they are but
buffoon-folk, and we should have enjoyed their harlequinades and
would have made them dance to us a wee and all and some tell us
tales to gladden our minds; after which we would have suffered
them depart and go about their own business." The wife enquired,
"And given that they knew neither dancing nor story-telling what
hadst thou done with them?" and replied he, "Had the case been as
thou sayest and they ignorant of all this, verily we would have
killed them and cast them into the chapel of case." The four men
hearing such threatening words muttered to themselves, "There is
no Majesty and there is no Might save in Allah, the Glorious, the
Great;" but the Kazi said in his mind, "How remain Judge of this
city when I shall have been found garbed in gaberdine and bonnet
and dancing and tale-telling? and indeed this is the greater
death. Allah bring to ruin this adulteress of a woman!" Then the
Flesher took thought as follows, "How shall I continue to be
Chief of the Butchers when I prance about with a bonnet on my
pate? this is indeed a painful penalty!" Then quoth the
Gentleman, the Consul, "How shall it be with me when I am seen
dancing and donning a bonnet? indeed death by the sword were
lighter than this!" Then muttered the Trader which was the
woman’s neighbour, "’Tis easier to kill myself with my own hand
than to endure all such ill." Anon the woman said to her husband,
"Inshallah—God willing—on the morrow we will bring them hither
to thy house that we may solace ourselves therewith;" but said
he, "Walláhi, hadst thou brought them this night ’twere better,
for that to-morrow evening I have business in the house of the
Chief Emir." Quoth she to him, "Now grant me immunity and give me
permission and I will arise and bring them to thee at this
moment, but each must come to thee alone and by himself." Quoth
he, "O Woman, leave I do give thee and immunity I do grant thee;"
whereupon she rose without stay or delay and went to the closet
wherein was the Judge. Then she opened it and entered, and taking
him by the hand dragged him forward and came out with him and set
him before her spouse garbed as he was in gaberdine and bonnet.
The house-master scrutinised him and was certified of his being
the Kazi and said to him, "Blessed be to thee, O our lord, this
bonnet and this gaberdine which become thee passing well." But
the Judge, as he stood before the presence of the woman’s
husband, bowed his front downwards and was clothed as with a
garment in the sweat of shame and was sore abashed, when the Emir
said to him, "O our lord the Kazi, do thou dance for us a wee the
baboon dance and rejoice us; after which performance do thou tell
us a tale that our breasts may thereby be broadened." But when
the man said this to him, the Judge feared for his life because
he had heard and well remembered the words of the householder and
he fell to clapping his palms and prancing to right and left.
Hereupon the Emir laughed consumedly, he and his wife, and they
signed and signalled each to other deriding the judicial dance,
and the Kazi ceased not skipping until he fell to the floor for
his fatigue. Hereupon the man said to him, "Basta! Now tell us
thy tale that we may rejoice thereat; then do thou rise up and go
about thy business." "Hearkening and obedience," said the Judge
and forthright he began to relate the adventure of